Female
Orgasm
Mysteries and magic of the female orgasm
We live in a highly sexualized society, where everything from
children’s toys to the grocery store checkout aisle are
practically screaming “SEX.” But when it comes to female
pleasure, there’s still a lot of mystery and misunderstanding.
Most women still don’t talk frankly about sex with their
doctors. We have yet to see the first rollout of a prescription
drug that would be the counterpart for women of a Viagra or
Cialis. Even medical researchers admit they don’t know
everything about the female orgasm.
However, there’s plenty that couples can do, and many resources
available to ensure she’s not getting shortchanged. Here’s an
overview to help you get started down the path to peak pleasure
for her.
Female Sexual Response Cycle
In the heat of passion, it’s not too likely anyone’s thinking
about “stages” or compartmentalized little steps, but medical
literature does spell it out just that way, in four main
stages. That is, you won’t need this info so that you can give
a big “woo hoo! We just hit stage two!” However, it’s helpful
to know a little something about how it all works, whether
you’re the woman seeking ultimate pleasure or her partner who’s
aiming to please. Here are the four parts of the female sexual
response cycle:
- Excitement
begins with sights, sounds, smells and/or ideas and
anticipation, or with touching, kissing or other physical
stimuli. In this stage, you’ll see or feel increased heart
rate, quicker breathing, and vaginal swelling and
lubrication due to increased blood flow. Often the
excitement stage is an excellent arena for experimentation
and the use of interesting stimulants or oils, as described
in the article
Having Sex or Having the Big One.
- Plateau is
the continuation of arousal, as long as stimulation
continues. There’s more vaginal swelling and an increase in
muscle tension. Breasts may also swell, the nipples become
erect, and the uterus dips.
- Orgasm is
the climactic peak of the arousal, where muscles in the
vaginal, anus and abdomen contract in rhythm. This intensely
pleasurable stage may last seconds, minutes or longer. Some
women describe orgasm as a series of diminishing waves;
others say it’s like a seismic event (hence popular
references like “rock my world” or “the earth moved”). This
is the stage that most often confounds men, because they
often aren’t sure what will tip her over from plateau to
orgasm. In
Having Sex or Having the Big One, there are a number
of tools and techniques for achieving climax described in
more detail.
- Resolution
is that wiped-out, blissful state following orgasm, where
the body’s revved-up functions return to normal -- blood
releases away from the vagina, breasts and nipples relax,
and heart rate, breathing and blood pressure go down.
It’s also important to understand that women don’t typically
just boom-boom-boom through the stages in order, and in fact,
that is one of the beautiful things about a great sexual
session: all the stages are pleasurable and nice, and a woman
may cruise back and forth between almost-climax and back to
plateau. Playing this ebb and flow, prolonging it and drawing
out the physical stages, may actually contribute to a greater,
more satisfying orgasm. |
